Why I’m Proud to be Imperfect, and You Should be too! #BehindTheBlogger
The sun was setting behind the trees and the scalding South Carolina heat was finally beginning to lessen to a more reasonable temperature. Waiting for the pizza we ordered, we drank cold beers and laughed on my friend’s front porch. There were four of us, all very different, enjoying the afternoon together.
We got to discussing personality tests, although I must admit that I have no clue how the conversation got there. Nonetheless, there we found ourselves, chatting about our zodiac signs (I’m a leo, hear me roar!) and our Myers-Brigg’s personality type (I’m an ENFP, extraverted-intuitive-feeling-perceiving, “the campaigner,” but I believe I’m a bit more introverted than most campaigners). One friend mentioned a test I’d never heard of and insisted we all try it.
The Ennegram Test
He grabbed his laptop, pulled up the website, and handed me the computer. I was up first.
The quiz asks you to select which of two statements most accurately describes you. For example, one question was “My success is a result of…” and the options were something like “my high energy and motivation” or “my knowledge and intellect” (these are not verbatim).
After we each completed the test (I’m a Seven, the enthusiast), we got to talking about the questions that were asked and how we answered. What stood out most to me was that we all agreed that it was often hard to distinguish between how we want to be and how we actually are. As my one friend put it, “I’d like to think I’m a self-motivated hard worker … but my couch, Netflix account, and dogs may tell a different story.”
The difference between who we want to be and who we are
Us humans strive to be so many things, especially those that we think we are “supposed” to be. In general, we want everything to be just right and to have all our ducks in a row. We try to hide anything in our life that isn’t perfectly in order the very best we can.
But let’s face it, we’re all kind of a mess.
We run late, spill coffee on our white shirts, forget that important work file at home the day we need it, get angry and say things we don’t mean, and so on. We all fuck up, we are all imperfect. Well, I at least know for sure that I am. I am imperfect and flawed and I accept that. I am proud to be imperfect.
Did you really think I just came up with those four examples of how we’re all a mess without having lived them?
I am a walking, talking, real life hot mess.
Sometimes, I talk so fast I stumble over my words and other times I forget what I’m saying mid-sentence.
There was a period of time when coaching and counting out loud for the group (number of seconds for a stretch or number of push-ups, etc.), I would just skip number 12. This would happen every time. Now, I skip numbers indiscriminately or change the direction that I’m counting. (“One, two, six, five, four …”). Yes, I have a Ph.D. but can’t count to thirty properly.
“Ouch, that’s going to bruise.”
When it comes to dropping and/or spilling things, the rate at which I do so is both alarming and impressive. Despite clearly seeing the objects in my way, I run into tables, chairs, door frames, you name it. The number of bruises on me at any given time has caused a number of people to be concerned that someone may be hitting me (which they’re not – if anything it could be said I’m hitting myself). At the current moment, I have a scrape on my knee from falling up some cement stairs, two busted toes from where I kicked the ever living daylights out of my stove while moving things to paint my kitchen, and a bruised left hand from squishing my hand between my car door and myself. True story.
Although I feel like I clean constantly, my house always seems to be a mess. I keep a weird schedule and like to do things at night most people would only do during the day. Though tough as nails, I cry at commercials (especially those about families because mine are scattered around the US and I just miss them so much!).
“I’ll call her back after I finish this task …. “
I forget to call people back all the time. Despite seeing the text message alert, I don’t text people back right away, even those I like and want to text back, for some reason I just don’t.
I cuss, a lot. Like a lot a lot. I could make a sailor blush, especially right after I run into one of those tables or chairs that keep jumping out in my way. You may not know it because I try my damnedest to keep it in check here, but given the theme of this post I’m letting a few slip. I oversleep and then am late for work (at which point I cuss quite a bit). This is especially annoying because it happens whether I try to go to bed early or not.
“Wait, where’s my phone?”
I misplace my belongings entirely too often. Seriously, it’s safe to say I “lose” at least one thing every day. Of course I find it eventually, but do you know how irritating it is to have to look for your phone, your keys, your shoes, your license, or something that important every day? What’s worse is I have certain spots I like to put things in but do I find them there? No, of course not. I end up sticking them somewhere thinking it’s a great place for it and I’ll be sure to find it when I need it. Wrong.
And the list goes on …
I make promises I can’t keep. I take on too many projects and forget to respond to emails. There are days I forget to eat until after I get off work at 4. I lose my temper. I love to spend money, even if I’m working less than normal. Most of the time I feel like I have no clue what I am doing with my life. Some may describe me as spontaneous, but really I act on a whim without thinking my ideas through. I’m a mess. That’s me. Those are my flaws and all of it is true.
It’s better to be weird than boring.
My gymnasts and I joke about this constantly. Side note, this kid is totally weird, but she also happens to be one of the coolest people I know. I absolutely cannot wait to see her grow up and see the adult she turns into. Holy shit she’s going to be cool. Anyway, whenever I say something wrong (i.e., count like a moron) or she asks me a strange question, one of us will say to the other, “Well, it is better to be weird than boring.” And it is true!
I am proud to be imperfect
My flaws are a part of who I am. I am proud to be flawed. These flaws give me character and make me interesting, but they don’t define me. There’s a lot more to me than these imperfections.
I am incredibly empathetic and optimistic and I give people the benefit of the doubt. I am observant and caring. If someone looks down, I will always ask them what is wrong and what I can do to help. I am driven, persistent, and I dream big. I’m friendly and outgoing.
I don’t judge. A lot of people say that and yet secretly they do, but I assure you I really don’t. (Remember that list of stuff I just rambled off to you? Yea, I have no room to judge.) I am very forgiving and will admit when I’m wrong. Laughter is the best medicine – I love to laugh and make others laugh. When it comes to work ethic, I pour myself into things and never half ass things. I love animals and couldn’t hurt a fly (a palmetto bug — aka a giant flying cockroach — maybe, but not a fly). I am good with babies and kids, and coaching my gymnasts is perhaps the most rewarding thing in my life. As for my relationships, I’m fiercely loyal and will always stand up for and alongside the people I care about. My point? I’m a lot more than my flaws.
Embrace the imperfection
Maybe we should all stop trying to be these things we think we should be and just be who we are, bruises, cusses, unanswered phone calls and all. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t set goals for ourselves and should stop trying to better ourselves (I swear I’m going to stop being late to things. I will always continue to try at that.). It just means we should forgive ourselves and not beat ourselves up when we fuck up. We are only human after all.
Are you perfect? If so, this may not have been the post for you. But if you’re a hot mess like me, I’d love to hear how you embrace your flaws.
Are you proud to be imperfect? If so, I want to hear about it! Tell me about what makes you interesting and unique, even if those are also the things that make you a mess. Please leave your thoughts and/or questions in the comments section below. Hope to hear from you! (As I’ve just admitted, it may not be the most prompt of responses, but I do promise I will).
What is #BehindTheBlogger?
Also, I’d like to take a second to explain what the hashtag in the title is all about. There’s a wonderful group of bloggers who participate in the “behind the blogger” posts. Basically, the Hopping Bloggers provide a brief prompt from which participating bloggers craft a post. By including what you see below, Behind the Blogger links together a community of bloggers. That is what this is all about, right? I know it is for me anyway. So now and again, that hashtag will appear in my titles. Those posts will be based on the prompt with which I’ve been provided and because of the #BehindtheBlogger network, will allow you to find other participating blogs you may find interesting as well.
Thank you for reading a story from #BehindTheBlogger Hop. Every 2 weeks a group of bloggers is given a writing prompt. These prompts are very open ended, so our bloggers can write about whatever they desire. The main rule is that their blog post directly relates to the topic of that week. The point of this hop is for our readers to get to know us on a personal level.
Please hop along and read all of the blog posts in this weeks hop. Just click the links below. If you want real and raw emotion, then you will find it here. After you read each post, please comment and share. We want to get to know you too!